Establishing a relationship with a carer

You’ll want to establish an open relationship with your carer. One where you build a relationship of trust and open dialogue. You should create an environment where you are able to discuss your loved one’s dementia care and how it will be delivered. You should both be able to discuss any challenges or difficulties. 

You should set out your expectations of your chosen carer and they should be able to define what they need to deliver the best care for your loved one and to be most successful in the care delivery for your loved one.

You will need to work through a dementia care plan with the carer. They will need to understand the history of the dementia patient, where they grew up, significant parts of their history and so on. Often in dementia care it helps to build memory books and to use favourite music to calm them on anxious days. If you can give you chosen carer as much information about the patient, it helps them know more about them and find activities that they can encourage them to do, or even become a starting point for conversations. It is easier to talk with a dementia patient about their history and transport them to some of their surviving happy memories in relation to that time. 

Most importantly, recognise that your carer is only human and, as long as they display the willingness and efforts to improve your loved one’s life, they’re likely doing their best. If however, you feel that your loved one is becoming more distressed, or you start to notice things with their appearance, such as their nails being dirty, or they are very resistant to being cleaned, you might need to revisit either your choice in care provider, or carefully consider whether live in care is right for your loved one. 

As we discuss elsewhere, care for the dementia patient needs to be patient centric to be the most successful and to ensure that the dementia patient is happiest. Taking any other approach will not consider the patient’s individual needs, rather identtify them as a dementia patient rather than the person that they are.

Help and support available

For those in need of domiciliary care, financial support may be available, subject to eligibility. Ask your local council for a needs assessment, to determine whether they can offer to pay for your care. The amount you’re entitled to depends on your income and savings. The council will also provide a dementia care plan, if they are paying for some or all of your domestic support but you can also revisit this and share some of the patient’s history with the care-giver, as outlined above. You can use a homecare agency or employ your own carer, depending on your preference. Remember that if you are directly employing someone, you need to be absolutely certain that you have cross referenced their history and references, because you are dealing with sensitive and important care giving for your loved one. Remember that if you recruit direct, your care giver will not be registered with the CQC and therefore you will not be able to check any investigations or reports on the quality of care that is being delivered. 

All domiciliary care providers have to be registered with the CQC and therefore you can find out how their care provision has been assessed to be sure that you are happy with the services that they have provided.

Costs

A dementia carer from the agency cost anywhere from £14 to an average of £20 per hour, however, this varies, depending on your location. When contacting an agency, make sure you are clear on all charges, services, carer’s experience and training. Familiarise yourself with all clauses of the contract, ask to have a look at a standard contract and, if the council is paying for your care, request a copy of the contract the agency has signed with the council. Understand any break clauses and how you can escalate issues if necessary.